Return to Derp

The last time I posted some of my ‘derp’ photos the response was unexpectedly positive – so I promised I’d do it again. Finally, here are some more of my not-so-good pictures, complete with closed eyes, stupid expressions, and strange poses:

Starting with both a stupid expression and a strange pose, this photo was taken back during my aquarium trip, where I was photographed by Delilah’s husband. The shark is a recommended photo opportunity, but I obviously did not make the most of it!

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Falling Water

When Apollo and I were in the Hokianga, we spent a lot of our time doing as little as possible (and fucking). But we did spend one day exploring the region – and in the afternoon we hunted down this track, which we’d seen on the map and then travelled quite a lot of metal road to get to:

I’m not a huge fan of long tramps, but the walk to the waterfall looked lovely (in the click-through? it’s the extremely short, barely noticeable, dotted red line). It was a shit of a hike, up steep steps and slippery paths, to get there. Thankfully, the waterfall was totally worth it!

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Ye Olde Cottage

Given that New Zealand’s been colonised for less than 200 years (by Europeans, that is – the Maori have been here considerably longer), there’s not a huge amount of choice when it comes to genuine Historical Places. The Stone Store in Kerikeri is one, as the oldest stone building in the country (Apollo and I visited it on our honeymoon), and there are various ruins like the Buried Village in Rotorua (also visited with Apollo).

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Mmm, Buttplugs!

I am rather a big fan of anal, and of anything that can be safely stuffed up the rear passage – be it fingers, cocks, or plugs. I’m also quite equal opportunity when it comes to arseholes: I like mine being filled, but I also really like filling those of others. Seems fair, after all!

My sprawling toy collection has a few plugs, which pleases me – there’s variety, and when I was doing my anal training I had different sizes to work my way up to:

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If I Were a Zombie…

…I’d look much like this: absolutely morgeous!

I’d also probably bite even more often than I do now … (click through to see my ‘focused on brains’ look.)

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The Great Outdoors

I love having sex – I think we all know that by now! And I’m a bit of an exhibitionist, too. Add those together, and outdoor sex is one of those things I really enjoy, even if I don’t do it often. One of those things about outdoor sex, though, is that the potential for amazingness – and disaster – is often increased…

Let’s get the (hilarious in retrospect) disasters out of the way first, shall we? It turns out golf courses use sprinklers – and they turn on about dusk, drenching the hapless couple getting it on nearby. Who knew? Then there’s bamboo. The otherwise excellently concealed piece of parkland where I chose to fling my virginity away – yes, really – had small shoots growing. Right where the small of my back was. Didn’t matter how I repositioned myself, it always ended up just there. It was a toss-up what was less fun, that day. And then there was the day-trip to Picton where rampant horniness got the better of us, and so we put a towel down in the bush by the ferry terminal and went for it. Apparently other people had the same idea, and managed to – literally – stumble across us. Oops!

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Sign Me Up

I spent a long time looking for the right street sign to be photographed with for the Scavenger Hunt, and I thought I had it: just one suburb away from our house is a road liberally sprinkled with signs stating “Share with Care” (referring to bicycles and cars sharing together). Which didn’t put me in mind of vehicular road sharing! Still, with the road being so busy, I was having difficulty figuring out how to get the shot.

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Hokianga View

When Apollo and I went up to the Hokianga for a holiday a few months back, we woke up on our first full day there to this glorious view:

I rather get the impression Apollo was looking at the view inside while I was looking out across the harbour, though!

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Relaxing in the Hokianga Sunshine

Seems like I am so slow to get around to writing about my amazing experiences, these days! Earlier this year Apollo and I took a much-needed break and travelled up to the Hokianga, which was an area of New Zealand neither of us had been to before. We stayed at a friend’s holiday home for 5 glorious days, with absolutely nothing planned except relaxation time.

Relax we did! We slept in, fucked (on the very very creaky bed), read a whole bunch, fucked in the sunshine, played Scrabble, watched out-of-date TV shows, and fucked some more. Oh, and spent one day exploring the Hokianga area, too, but the photos from that exploration are for another post.

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Sticky and Slippery and Covered in Come

I’m a wanton, greedy, messy slut. Delightedly so! And while Apollo may not have known that the day we met, he certainly did just a few days later, once I’d thoroughly seduced him. It’s one of my charm points, you know. Me? Slutty. He’s fine with that. It works well for us.

Being as I am, and being polyamorous, I also share my wantonness around – another thing Apollo knew when we met (seducing a wonderful woman from Wellington the day after we met and the day before I took him home? Yeah, that might have given that away …).  But! I do keep one thing – one single solitary thing out of my great big bag of fun-sexy-stuff-to-play-with – just for him. Yes, there is one thing I do with my husband that I don’t do with any other partner – one thing that I am really happy to keep just for us.

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