For me fisting is one of the hottest, more intimate, sexual acts out there. To trust a partner enough to relax, to open wide, to envelop them within you – to cradle them tight and deep and incredibly slickly – is an act of such mindfulness that I have done it with very few people.
Fisting isn’t quite as it sounds (any more than a blow-job is!) – but the name puts many people off trying it. I think that’s a shame, because the sensations – both as the fistee and the fister – are amazing.
My first experience of fisting was as the person doing the fisting, and it wasn’t planned at all! It was early in my relationship with Aphrodite, and we’d spent an entire afternoon in bed, entangled and loving and tasting and teasing and going back for more. As with all new relationships, we couldn’t get enough of each other, and I couldn’t keep my hands off her (unless she was the one with her hands busy on me). I was kneeling in front of her as she lay spread, once again sliding my fingers in and around her luscious labia, dipping them into her cunt – and she asked for more, wanting penetration. So I slipped two fingers inside, curling them in the way I knew she liked. She wanted more, and so I gave her more, adding another. And then another. As she begged for more, I brought my other hand in, doing a slow tease of her clitoris as my fingers pressed and moved in her cunt.
I had five fingers gently caressing her insides – and then suddenly my palm was gone. My wrist was squeezed by her cunt muscles as she pressed down upon me. And I was fisting!
My most recent fisting experience was with m’Lady – and it was with such delight and pleasure and intensity – on the receiving end.
Opening myself to m’Lady is something I want to be able to do more of, and so the two lots of fisting we did whilst I was visiting hir recently (this was the second time – the first we didn’t photograph) were both extremely intense, both physically and emotionally. With m’Lady there is also the power dynamic, and opening to hir in this way means something more to both of us.
From my journal entry about the first experience: Very late last night we ended up with m’Lady fisting my cunt. I was so needy, greedy, wanting, desiring of more fullness within. Even the occasional scrape of fingernail and catch of rings didn’t stop me aching and groaning for more, please, or m’Lady for offering more.
Because of my desire to be able to open more, and my owners wish to be able to take me more easily, from today I also have an Expansion Training Programme. We’ve spent the last month discussing this, and I’ve spent some time putting it together: deciding on the toys to use; the timeline; and how to make it work. The ultimate goal is to make both my cunt and my arse more used to accepting larger sizes, and thus amenable to large toys, hands or whatever else happens to appeal to a) me, b) my owner (as is hir wont, and my pleasure), or c) the both of us.
I am really looking forward to starting it this afternoon! The next 10 weeks are going to be … eye-opening.
October 21st is International Fisting Day, created by Courtney Trouble and Jiz Lee last year – which is why I’m writing this today (across most of the planet it still is – I’m technically a day late in New Zealand), as I did last year.
Here are some other excellent resources.
Excellent Blog Posts
The Day has come – It’s Just a Hobby
Happy Fisting Day! – Kendra Holliday aka The Beautiful Kind
Fisting Day – Evoe Thorne aka My Whole Sex Life
Fisting Day 2012 – An Appreciation Post – Jillian Boyd aka Lady Laid Bare
Beautiful Fisting Pics
Great Books to Read
A Hand in the Bush: The Fine Art of Vaginal Fisting - Deborah Addington
Trust, the handbook: The Guide to the Sensual and Spiritual Art of Handballing - Bert Hermann (handballing = anal fisting)