Intriguing Reading #21

Posted on | April 9, 2012 | 4 Comments |

My regular roundup of interesting reads, found from all over the place.

Known Unknowns, and Unknown Unknowns: When S&M Scenes Go Wrong: “Both these scenes gone wrong involved “unknown unknowns.”  There was something important that I didn’t even know I didn’t know.  I didn’t know that Holly’s interest in Daddy/girl dynamics didn’t translate to a more general interest in roleplay.  Bryce didn’t know that a light face slap was completely off limits.” (Lily Lloyd)

#Mcon: Initial Thoughts: “… while we, as a community, talk a lot about the sexiness in theory of a lot of different bodies and diversity, in practice, who do we choose to flirt with and fuck?  We say it’s just about who we click with, who we find attractive- but isn’t it interesting how that tends to follow certain prescribed “attractive” party lines- white, slim, able-bodied, cisgendered. Not *always*, of course. But when you go to a conference like this, look around at who’s making eyes at who. Maybe it was shyness. But maybe, too, we’re not as body-positive as we like to think we are.” (Kitty Stryker)

What Does Healthy Sexuality Look Like?: “In healthy sexuality, consent counts. Autonomy counts. Only you can decide what healthy sexuality is for you. That also means you don’t have the right to decide what someone else’s sexuality should include.” (Nadia West / Good Vibes)

the chunky/gorgeous woman on the subway: “…the whole world is full of people who say ‘chunky.’ I am chunky. I am chunky and beautiful. And even if you don’t think I’m chunky—I want to be able to be chunky. I want to be able to gain more weight without having to feel ugly. And I don’t want it to be because I have a pretty face. I don’t have a conventional face. And now I don’t have a conventional body. Nothing about me is conventional anymore. It’s all different. It’s all difficult. And I want that to be beautiful.” (Kate / eat the damn cake)

Where Have All the Blowjobs Gone? Why Esquire is Wrong: “But what’s happening now is different, because women are giving blowjobs to please themselves at least as much as to please their lovers, and as someone who falls into that category, I believe this kind of ownership of the BJ can be a little unsettling for men used to having to wheedle their way between a woman’s lips. We don’t just like going down, we talk about it, in detail. We’re not closing our eyes and hoping the guy will come quickly; we want to savor every last moment of it, from start to messy finish.” (Rachel Kramer Bussel / Open Salon)

‘War on Women’ as Fake as ‘War on Caterpillars,’ Says Totally Sober RNC Chairman: “Intrigued by Priebus’ completely out-of-the-blue comparison, I wondered if maybe I was missing something and there was some great caterpillar war about which I’ve been ignorant. So I did some research. A quick google search revealed that from 1912 until the 1970’s, it was actually illegal to have a caterpillar in your yard in Seattle. But that’s over now. Caterpillars are no longer rounded up into camps where they’re forced to spend their days crawling up plants very slowly under the cruel, watchful eye of bird overseers. It’s a new era, an era when caterpillars and humans can coexist and we’ve put all that “not in my backyard” business behind us.” (Erin Gloria Ryan / Jezebel)

Hitting That: “I’d also argue that the stereotypes of bisexuals are damaging in and of themselves. We’re promiscuous, heartless, self-absorbed exhibitionists lacking in empathy and compassion. We’re sluts. We’re “over-sexed” – a phrase deliciously packed with social conditioning. We are, in short, the women of least value. If you’re the kind of man with jealousy issues who needs to control his partner, it’s not just men you have to keep away from your bisexual missus, it’s everyone. Seriously, the slag could be getting it on with anyone at all. Imagine the strain that places on your average rat-bastard.” (Emma Hart / Public Address) comments are worthy reading

A Dozen Years: “I wrote a poem about this abortion, a heavy-handed lyrical thing that I won’t share because it’s bad writing, though not because I disagree with anything I wrote. The one line I remember, without looking it up, is “this is how sure I had to be in order to be the me I was meeting in dreams.” Getting pregnant meant I needed to be that much more sure that I was queer. This is how hard it’ll be, the universe told me, to stop being heterosexual. You can have this partner and this baby, if you want it. Are you sure?  Yes. I was that sure.” (Sinclair Sexsmith)


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4 Responses to “Intriguing Reading #21”

  1. Plenty of Pleasures
    April 11th, 2012 @ 3:05 am

    Really love the condom or android pic I will repost that pic on my fb and twitter
    Thank you

  2. Dee
    April 13th, 2012 @ 1:00 pm

    You’re welcome Terry! As noted, it’s from an article on Gismodo.

    xx Dee

  3. Lily
    April 22nd, 2012 @ 12:51 pm

    How’d I miss this? Thanks, Dee!

  4. Dee
    April 22nd, 2012 @ 2:05 pm

    You’re most welcome, Lily! It was really interesting reading :)

    xx Dee


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