Razor’s Edge

All sorts of pain turns me on. Some I’ve experienced, some I’ve merely fantasised about. Some I want to try, but haven’t had the opportunity. Some I’ve done on myself, but am restless in the knowledge that having someone else’s hands on my flesh would be much more effective.

I’ve imagined my flesh parting under a blade – opening like a small mouth, breathing exquisite pain and bloody words. I imagine the burn, afterward. I feel myself getting drippingly wet as I fantasise about my eyes being blindfolded, not knowing where the next cut will be.

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Hot and damp

I treated myself to a delicious long bath this afternoon. I try to have one every few weeks, and the day after one of Hygeia’s incredible massages tends to be the best, to soothe my aches away. Today the weather was quite hot and muggy (New Zealand in summer tends to be like that), but I ran the water hot anyway, sprinkling epsom salts into the running stream from the taps.

I stopped the flow as the bathtub reached two-thirds full, remembering just how close to the edge the sloshing water rises when I slip my body into it. Indeed, today was no exception, with the heat covering me – feet, thighs, arse, back – as I lowered myself in. It flowed across my cunt and lower belly, settling into a comfortable pool over my lower half.

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Fat and sexy

See those curves? Those are mine. I love them.

I love my breasts, which are large and heavy. Sometimes they become more gravid than usual, drooping down toward my torso – usually as my sex drive rises.

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Intimacy with Perseus

Skin

So very smooth under my fingertips. I explore a new world of dips and crevasses, my hands roaming from his shoulders down to his waist, across thighs and buttocks. His toes are long, and curl under my touch.

Words

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Thunderstruck

My life is well known for being complicated, and I take joy in the many and varied permutations that a polyamorous lifestyle allows for. But embarking on a new voyage always brings trepidation with it, and falling for somebody new is by turns terrifying and delightful.

I saw Perseus again last night.

(No, I still haven’t fucked him. But I really, really want to.)

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Delightfully debauched

This evening I had a long and lovely visit from Dionysos, my former secondary. While he and I no longer play together, we are still good friends, and it was great to spend some quality (ie: without other people around) time with him – it had been too long.

There are a lot of things I miss about Dionysos. We had a secondary relationship for about three years, and together we slowly discovered our mutual enjoyment of BDSM – with him being dominant, and me being submissive. It was with trepidation and excitement that I learned to let my control go, safe in the knowledge that I could snatch it back in a second with just a word. That giving up control meant I had power.

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